Tuesday, April 20, 2010

How Not to Take Everything Personally

Blow-ups, mouth fights, arguments, misunderstandings happen - even to closest friends. But that doesn't mean you have to throw everything down the drain including your friendship when it happens.

I've had my own fair share of misunderstandings. Yes, it was hard, it was tough and it was such a pain in the ass. But, as much as I hate to admit it, I was partly the one to be blame. Misunderstanding can't happen just from one side of a party, anyway.

Everytime when it happened, I got mad. Yes, who wouldn't be pissed when someone bad-mouth, bitch about you or make false stories of you behind your back? I would, for sure.

But never would I cut the friendship ties with any of them. After the storm has gone, we would always go back to where we were before that happened. After all, that's the real measure of a true friend - the one who would always accept your flaws and forgive each other's differences.

That's not being hypocrite, double-faced or anything you want to call it. That's forgiveness and not taking everything too seriously and personally.

So, it bothers me to know how a friend would just cut off some of my friends and I from her for some silly things which we didn't even realize we did to her - indirectly, of course. Worse, she bitched about all of us behind and brought back stories from dinosaur-age about things that pissed her off.

I mean, for real? She's much older than all of us, anyway.

You know what bothers me the most? People who has issues but never had the balls to confront it face to face.

She could go around and bitch about everything to everyone about us but never has the guts to come forward and barf everything in front of us. Nope, never.

You know why confronting face-to-face is important? Because it gives the accused a chance to defend him/herself and who knows, you might be wrong for accusing people for something they never did or intended.

That's why it is important.

I would be lying if I say "I don't really care about you, bitch!" I do care, yes - but just because I need to have her feet on the ground. She really needs to learn how to act according to her age, be respectful of other people's feeling, not to take everything personally and have the courage to tell the people she's pissed with how she really feels.

I don't really care about what she says about me. Truthfully, I've heard lots of worse stories about me before behind my back but none of it mattered. You know why? Because only God, my true friends and myself know the real deal about me. Even my brother in law shares the same sentiment.

To quote Samantha in Sex and the City, "If I worry about what people are gonna say about me, I'd never leave the house!"

So, to you, my dear, sad friend, strip off your pride and please reflect on whatever that you're doing right now because you're only fooling yourself, nobody else. It really hurts to admit that you're wrong even in the slightest way, but you'll gain so much more by doing it. Peace out.


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